Want your partner to change? You might accidentally be hurting your cause. Here's what to do differently.
By Jonathan Decker, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist You’ve likely seen the hilarious YouTube video “It’s Not About the Nail,” about the wife with a nail in her forehead, telling her husband about the pressure and pain she constantly feels. He suggests that she get the nail removed and grows frustrated when she insists that “it’s not about the nail,” ...[Read More]
By Jonathan Decker, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist While some dads are deadbeats and some mothers truly do an amazing job raising kids on their own, the lasting effects of a great father cannot be underestimated. I should know, because my dad is amazing. I say this neither to boast nor to gush, but rather because, in both my personal and professional opinion, he’s got this dad thing ...[Read More]
By Jonathan Decker, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Although increasingly common, stepfamilies (or “blended” families) are often misunderstood. Old-fashioned types may see them as abnormal. Well-meaning “progressives” erroneously assume that blended families are the same as first-marriage families “once the dust settles.” Research and experience demonstrate, however, that “the i ...[Read More]
By Jonathan Decker, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist There may be no greater argument against lifelong monogamy than the bored couple in the restaurant. “Oh heaven, please don’t let us end up like them,” you may have thought as you observe them silently picking at their food, looking at their phones, or vacantly scanning the restaurant for something presumably more interest ...[Read More]
By Jonathan Decker, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Note: this article represents a combination of the author’s insights and information from the book How to Improve You Marriage Without Talking About It, by Steven Stosny Ph.d and Patricia Love. For the record, dishonesty, manipulation, and blame-shifting aren’t exclusively male problems. We all know women and girls who do the same. Also, ...[Read More]
By Jonathan Decker, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist This article contains a frank, but not crass, discussion of sex and is intended for mature readers. CHASING AFTER MIRAGES You see the headlines screaming at you from the magazine rack at the grocery store. They say things like “Rock His World Tonight,” and “101 Forbidden Positions to Spice Things Up!” If you check ...[Read More]